Digital Chaos Media

Allright, lets get it out there from the get go. I am IN the restaurant business in New York. I can’t promise that one of these days I won’t shamlessly plug one of my company’s restaurants or even review one straight up. I am biased. I am opinionated. I am also pretty damn good at recognizing a good eating establishment. That being said, I am gonna talk about David Chang’s Momofuku Ssam Bar this week. Yeah, yeah, I know I should be reviewing Momofuku Ko and all its Michelin starred greatness, but honestly, even with my connections, I can’t swing a rezzie and I am too lazy, or not interested enough, to click my way legitamately to a seat. That whole online reservation system deserves a post all its own.

As for Ssam Bar…I remember when that place first opened. Nobody was going there, not even Chang himself. The place was empty and was serving asian burritos to guys like me, hungry and adventerous neighborhood people (yes, I used to be able to afford to live in Manhattan, and in the east village too!). To be honest, the only reason I ever went there was because I liked Noodle Bar and I took my food handler’s certification class with the chef who runs the kitchen at Ssam Bar. Either way my brother and I quickly became addicted to those burritos (I guess I should call them ssam). They were damn tasty. I mean come on, take a look.

Regardless, these ssam were not enough and there were soon rumors of a new late night menu. That menu quickly became their full time menu. Then they got reviewed by Bruni in the times. Then the place blew up. I mean blew the fuck up. It became the place you see today. impossible to get a table. Let me descibe this place to you. Better yet, let me show it to you:

Wait…

Thats not Ssam Bar. Thats Avec restaurant in Chicago. Chang straight up stole that bitch anyway. They look pretty much identical. Ah well. You get the idea. Its small. Narrow, wooden. Sleek. Its fun though. Lots of young people. A little cramped, but if you get stuck at the long bar across from a cute model type, you are in luck.

As for the food. Ah yes, they food. I suppose thats the most imporant thing. Its amazing. Yes, thats right. Say whatever you will about David Chang. He might be an pompous ass. He may steal restaurant design. But that crazy mofo knows how to cook pork. Its almost as if he has made some deal with the pig gods. I dont like to read reviews with long winded similes about the good. Let me just list off the things that you would bust a nut over eating at ssam bar:

Steamed Buns, don’t miss them. Their are imitators and then there is ssam.

Banh Mi- Not traditional. For that go to Nicky’s on 2nd st and Ave. A. But awesome nonetheless.

Spicy Pork Sausage with Rice Cakes- Spicy. Pork. Chewy.Rice. Cakes. Thats. It.

Crispy Pig’s Head Terrine- Dont think about it. Just savor the fatty head goodness.

Any of the Country hams-This is a nice touch here. You can’t find real country ham in the Northeast very often. Just think Prosciutto. American style.

So get out there and eat some pig. I don’t care which part.

Next time. I go down the block to give you an insider’s look at The Red Head.

-Von Heezy